The NFL draft is over, and your Minnesota Vikings have introduced a total of nine brand new players to the roster. For most, the instinct is to give each pick a letter rating to clearly demark which picks they like and which picks they dislike. However, I’ve decided to go for a different, infinitely more confusing approach by comparing each player to a candy bar. This approach was inspired by nothing in particular besides a personal urge to divulge my lack of candy bar knowledge, mixed with a personal urge to give my take on the draft picks. So without further ado, let’s see which picks were as sweet as a Snickers bar.
Caleb Banks - Twix Bar
Embed from Getty ImagesEmbed from Getty Images
Twix is, to me, one of the better candy bars on the market. The only thing I love more than a good Twix bar is a solid defensive tackle. However, that doesn’t mean that Twix bars are flawless. Sometimes, they can lose their crunch or melt, making them feel unsatisfying and disappointing. If it’s not already easy to see where I’m going with this, I’ll address Caleb Banks’ downside directly. He’s struggled with multiple foot injuries since 2024, and that’s a huge red flag. At the same time, his physical skills give him home run potential. Like a good Twix bar, Caleb Banks could be a smooth and reliable fit for the defense. The only question is whether or not the Vikings will get a perfectly crisp Twix bar or a slightly melted one.
Jake Golday - KitKat
Embed from Getty Images
Embed from Getty Images
KitKats are defined by their snap, meaning they can be broken in half and completely change form. Jake Golday, similarly, is a versatile piece that could immediately impact the Vikings’ defense. This linebacker played almost everywhere on Cincinnati’s defense last season, making him the perfect prospect to pair alongside Brian Flores. I don’t know if Brian Flores enjoys KitKat bars, but he certainly got a player with the same amount of flexibility as a KitKat bar in Jake Golday.
Domonique Orange - Snickers
Embed from Getty ImagesEmbed from Getty Images
When the Vikings drafted Domonique Orange in the third round, it felt like there was a collective sigh of relief from panicky Vikings fans. While there were plenty of question marks about the first two picks, this one felt like a natural fit. The Vikings are trying to beef up their d-line, so they went with a pick that satisfies their needs perfectly. If only there were a candy bar that advertised itself as a satisfying snack… Snickers was the obvious choice for this pick as Iowa State’s Domonique Orange is a massive player who the Vikings hope will be able to stuff the run for years to come.
Caleb Tiernan - Hershey’s Milk Chocolate
Embed from Getty ImagesEmbed from Getty Images
A basic Hershey’s Bar isn’t the flashiest pick, but it’s a reliable and abundant candy bar. Similarly, Caleb Tiernan wasn’t a pick that many Vikings fans expected. The Northwestern offensive tackle had a great college career, and on a team without Christian Darrisaw and Brian O’Neill, he might’ve ended up starting sooner rather than later. Still, with the constant injuries to both tackles, getting some depth at the position makes a lot of sense. Like a Hershey’s Bar, this was a pick that wasn’t going to win any effusive praise but would do in a pinch.
Jakobe Thomas - Crunch Bar
Embed from Getty ImagesEmbed from Getty Images
Crunch Bars, in my humble opinion, are very underrated. They’re just crispy enough to differentiate themselves from a plain candy bar, and they’re still smooth enough to enjoy without too much chewing. Jakobe Thomas, the safety from Miami, has a similar level of variability as he was a big hitter who could also force turnovers in a pinch. With Harrison Smith’s future up in the air, the Vikings needed a technician at safety. Although I don’t have proof, this pick felt very much like Brian Flores going to get his hand-selected Crunch Bar.
Max Bredeson - Take 5
Embed from Getty ImagesEmbed from Getty Images
Aside from being taken in the fifth round, fullback Max Bredeson is very similar to a Take 5 in several ways. Like a Take 5, he has different flavors for every situation as he can play fullback, tight end, and even carry the ball occasionally. Kevin O’Connell definitely wanted to add more complexity to the offense after the down year last year, and having someone like Max Bredeson should do just that. For a fifth-round pick, I expect Max Bredeson to be a sleeper choice for the Vikings’ most influential 2026 draft pick, just like I consider Take 5 bars to be a sleeper pick for the best candy bar.
Charles Demmings - Mars Bar
Embed from Getty ImagesEmbed from Getty Images
It may be a bit of a reach, but Mars Bar screams traditional to me. It feels like an antiquated candy bar of years long gone. That’s not to say that the Stephen F. Austin corner, Charles Demmings, is old. It’s more of a commentary that the Vikings seem to always be searching for a solid press cornerback. This feels like a traditional Vikings pick in that it’s a cornerback with a high ceiling that can be physical on wide receivers. I’ve never had a Mars Bar, so I have no solid opinions on it. That’s how I feel about Charles Demmings. I’m always open to the Vikings drafting a solid boundary corner, but I don’t know how Brian Flores plans to use him in the coming season.
Demond Claiborne - Milky Way
Embed from Getty ImagesEmbed from Getty Images
I love a good Milky Way bar, so naturally, I had to compare it to one of my favorite value picks in the draft. The Wake Forest running back Demond Claiborne is a bit undersized, but that never stopped him from being a dynamic back who was a threat to score on every play. The Vikings getting him in the sixth round is a huge pickup, as the team is in desperate need of home run potential in the running back room. Claiborne has the tools to take the Vikings offense out of this universe like a Milky Way bar.
Gavin Gerhardt - Butterfinger
Embed from Getty ImagesEmbed from Getty Images
You never want your center to have butter fingers, but this comparison is more about the role of the candy bar in the greater candy ecosystem rather than the literal meaning. Many mock drafters had the Vikings picking a center much earlier on, but the Vikings waited until the 6th round to take Gavin Gerhardt out of Cincinnati. Whether this will be a high-impact selection remains to be seen, but to me, this feels like a Butterfinger pick. It’s not my favorite candy bar, but I respect it.
This was a silly experiment, but the conclusion of draft season has me excited for the future of this team. Let me know which players you’re the most excited for and what candy bars you’re the most excited to eat after reading this article!
